April Happenings Part 1
I thought I would give a monthly report on what's going on in this little corner of England , West Sussex is nestled against Hampshire and Surrey.
I could present in the style of Garrison Keillor, " Welcome to Stedaaam , where the men are upright , except when they are planting out the carrots for the night fighters ( RAF WW2 joke ).And the women have long legs and their children have rosy cheeks.
Or I could tell it like the Peter Sellers parody of travel films from the fifties.
"Welcome to StedHAM gateway to the South Downs , a sleepy hamlet nestled by the river Rother , if you look closely your see the water-mill where the farmers take their corn "
On second thoughts , or should that read third, I'll hand out the corn.
So where shall I start , oh yes the kitchen . I've had it in mind to revamp my favourite room for a long time , but all the local builders take one look and I don't hear from them again. Across the road from the L'Ache community where I volunteer on Fridays , is a Polish Deli , so I asked them and her husband , who spoke very little English , as the job is very small ( probably why the Brits fled ) did the work. Well the results were more spit than polish , but it all works and I'm as pleased as Punch ( non alcoholic ).
I have an under active thyroid, probably the saving of me, nether the less I take pills which may have the side effects of creating excess acid , so I went to the hospital for a check (gastroscopy). Now have you ever had a TV camera poked down your gullet? If that's what being a Celebrity is like , then I'm getting out of there!
I will keep taking my cider vinegar and honey with garlic and ginger in spite of all the science.
I have been researching a cycle route for a South Downs Park leaflet , and it's been great fun . Part follows the Sussex Border Path which is off-road through forest , the rest is byways and part of the Shipwrights Way , back in the days when the Royal Navy ruled the world , this fifty mile route was used to cart the timber from the woods to Portsmouth .
On the route is a traditional Pub ( can't get a coffee ) so English it hurts , everything is home made and expensive but worth a stop. When it's finished I'll put it on-line.
Right now I'm on a train to visit someone I know who stopped taking the pills and attacked a policeman . So he has been sectioned . Coincidentally in Midhurst last week a car overtook me dangerously and I shook my fist . He stopped and wound down his window , whereupon asking him why he drove badly, I noticed he was wearing a blue uniform . " are you a policeman " I asked " yes " he said and I answered " you should be ashamed of yourself " He looked shocked and said " what's your name then" well I didn't know whether to laugh or cry , so I answered that I was going to report him to the police station just down the road . When I got there it wasn't open yet. So I gave it up as a bad joke.
For the next instalment of exciting cycling stories, keep in touch . PLG Tony